St. Paul writes that marriage is a sign of the marital love existing between Christ and His Church. The married couple is seen as a symbol of the unconditional love and intimate union between Jesus as the groom and the Church as His bride.

Marriage fills us with joy and gratitude. That is why we take the preparation and celebration of your wedding ceremony so seriously. Through the years, the many beautiful weddings at Our Lady of Lourdes have built a tradition of family and parish life that is very important to us.

These guidelines are important, whether your ceremony is simple or elaborate. Every wedding is significant. We want to help make your wedding the most important event in your life. To assist us in this task, we ask you to read these guidelines thoroughly.

Preparing for Your Marriage

Parishioners
Parishioners of Our Lady of Lourdes Parish and their children are welcome to be married at Lourdes. A parishioner is someone who has been registered in the parish for six months, actively participating in the Sacramental life of the parish and supporting the mission of Our Lady of Lourdes. Six months of preparation before the wedding is required. A free will offering of $500 is suggested for parishioners. This includes the services of the parish wedding facilitator on your wedding day and rehearsal.  However, this does not include the honorarium for the priest or deacon, nor does it include the honorarium for the altar servers. These are traditionally the responsibility of the groom's family. Please contact the pastor before making any plans to be married at Our Lady of Lourdes.

Non-Parishioners
We ask that you invite a priest or deacon of your choosing to prepare you and to officiate your wedding. If the priest or deacon is from a diocese other than the Archdiocese of Saint Louis, he must provide a letter of suitability from his local Ordinary. Your priest or deacon will complete all of the necessary paperwork and will assist you with planning your wedding ceremony in conjunction with the guidelines of the Catholic Church and the Archdiocese of St. Louis. The completed pre-nuptial investigation form, along with the other required documents, shall be delivered to Our Lady of Lourdes Parish Office no later than 30 days before the wedding. A fee is required to be paid at the time of booking the wedding. The fee to secure the church is $950 and includes the services of the parish wedding facilitator.  However, this does not include the honorarium for the priest or deacon, nor does it include the honorarium for the altar servers. These are traditionally the responsibility of the groom's family. This fee is not applicable to any weddings booked prior to October 2023.

Annulments
If you are awaiting the decision of the Marriage Tribunal regarding a possible annulment, please wait until you have received the final papers before calling to schedule a wedding.

Common Marriage Policy
The Bishops of Missouri have implemented a Common Marriage Policy. For all couples wishing to be married in this state, the priest who will witness your wedding will have complete details of this program. It involves:

• Assessing readiness for marriage. This involves the completion of the Fully Engaged FOCCUS test and completion of the Pre-Nuptial Investigation Form.
• Participating in one of the several marriage preparation programs available in the Archdiocese, such as Pre-Cana or Engaged Encounter.
• Obtaining a recently issued baptismal certificate from the church where you were baptized.

Confirming the use of Our Lady of Lourdes Church
Before a date and time for your wedding can be confirmed you will need to attend to the following:

• If you wish to have a priest or deacon of the parish officiate at your wedding ceremony, please contact him before setting a date or making other arrangements.
• If you wish to have a priest or deacon from outside the parish officiate at your wedding, he should agree to:
  • accept responsibility for sharing in your marriage preparation with you,
  • complete all necessary documentation and file it with us one month before the wedding,
  • be present for the rehearsal, and
  • witness your marriage ceremony.

Planning for Your Ceremony
Your wedding will most likely have some aspects of traditional ceremonies, but it will also reflect your own preferences. With this in mind, please consider these aspects of your celebration:

Music: Only approved liturgical music is permitted for the wedding celebration. If you wish to have organ music at your wedding, you are urged to consult our parish music director. If you wish to have other musicians or soloists, please make arrangements with them and supply details to the parish secretary.

Bride’s Room: Facilities for dressing at the church are limited. We request that brides and other members of the wedding party not dress on the premises. A small room at the rear of the church on the west side is available where the bridal party can gather before the ceremony.

Scheduling: Weddings may be scheduled on Friday evenings (the times are negotiable) or on Saturday at 11:00 a.m. or 2:00 p.m. Those wishing to be married at 2:00 p.m. on Saturday should be aware that the ceremony and any picture taking must conclude by 3:45 p.m. when Confessions are heard in the church. Receiving lines should take place at the reception and not at the church.

Altar Servers: Servers are valuable for weddings within a full Mass. If you have family members who can serve, please inform the parish secretary. Otherwise, servers can be requested from the parish, but are never guaranteed. The recommended stipend for each server is $20.00.

Rehearsal: Rehearsals are normally scheduled on a Thursday prior to the wedding date. Another date and time can be arranged if there is no conflict with the parish schedule. The priest officiating must be present. An honorarium is customarily given to the priest or deacon who celebrates your wedding.

Finalizing Details: Please call the parish secretary at least one month before the wedding to finalize details about arrangements in the church.

Florist: The people of Our Lady of Lourdes Parish are very proud of their church. When consulting with a florist, please keep the following in mind:

• Flowers should not arrive more than one hour prior to the ceremony.
• Fresh cut flowers only are permitted and should remain in the church after the ceremony.
• Liturgical decorations suitable to the seasons of the Church year cannot be taken down or otherwise disturbed.
• There are 22 pews, offering a seating capacity of just over 300 persons.
• Runners are not permitted.
• Unity Candles are not permitted.
• No flower petals are to be strewn down the aisle, nor may rice, confetti, bird seed, etc. be thrown on church property.

Photographs: During the ceremony, photographs may be taken as long as proper decorum is observed. Picture-taking on a limited basis is permitted after the ceremony and must conclude within one hour following the ceremony. This is especially true if another marriage ceremony or Confessions are scheduled to follow. The church and grounds are not available for photographs more than 30 minutes before the wedding ceremony.

Please note: Alcoholic beverages or other refreshments are not allowed in the church, bride’s room, sacristy nor on the parking lot prior to or following the rehearsal or the ceremony. Smoking is not permitted anywhere on the parish campus.

Outside Wedding Coordinators/Planners 
Please click the button below to read and sign the form regarding Outside Coordinator/Planner policy. You are encouraged to make use of the services of outside wedding planners or coordinators, but they must adhere to and sign this policy.

Outside Wedding Planner Policy

Lourdes Day-Of Wedding Facilitator
Our Lady of Lourdes provides a facilitator on the day of the event. They will be available to unlock the door 30 minutes prior to your scheduled rehearsal start time and one hour prior to your scheduled wedding ceremony start time. The facilitator will be present to perform tasks concerning the church building and facilities and other emergency needs. While they are happy to assist with the wedding itself, they are not a substitute for a personal or professional wedding planner or coordinator. The parish facilitator's duties begin on the evening of the wedding rehearsal, and any prior questions can be addressed with the parish secretary.

Blessings On Your Marriage
All of us at Our Lady of Lourdes Parish join in wishing you the happiest wedding. Whether simple or elaborate, your wedding should be a sacred occasion for you and your spouse. In the Catholic wedding ceremony, vows are exchanged between the spouses and God’s blessing is asked on their lives together. Your wedding celebrates the official beginning of your marriage. Marriage is an ongoing relationship between a man and woman that should support and encourage both spouses in the years ahead.

Your preparations and attention to detail signal your full understanding of the significance of this occasion. If we can assist you in any way, please let us know.